The Final Blog.

Neil Anderson says that success "is accepting God's goal for our lives and by His grace becoming what He has called us to be." When it comes to my health I must admit I have not succeeded. The Bible talks a lot about being self-controlled and self-control is one of the fruits of the Spirit. (Gal. 5:22-23)

"...let us be alert and self-controlled." (I Thes. 5:6)

"Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control." (Prov 25:26)

Broken down and defeated in my constant striving (OK, really my desire to treat my body correctly). But that's not the end of the story because God has already filled me with every spiritual blessing in Christ Jesus. (Eph. 1:3) He has already given me self-control! I must live by faith.

"Anyone then who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it sins." (James 4:17) I know the truth, I know that I have been given self-control through Christ Jesus. As I read this blog I think it sounds like I'm defeated but I am not. I did not exercise today and I have no good reason for it. Maybe I was getting a little cocky! I started to think if I didn't set the time aside I would still get to it but today I did not. Tomorrow I really doubt I will because I have to leave so early in the morning and won't be home until rather late. I see that schedule for a few days ahead of me and I realize that I could possibly find myself right back where I was when this began three weeks ago. Lord willing that will not happen. The most exciting thing that has come from this time is my joy for my devotion time. It was worth every minute just to get myself back into the Word. That is something I do not want to lose. More then anything else in life I desperately need Jesus. I believe this makes me a success.

Keeping on.

Now that I have seemingly created a new habit, I need to keep it. It's so easy for me to become complacent and begin letting one or two days go by without exercising or meditating on God's word. That's how I end up in the cycle of trying to get back on track. I guess I'm always going to be a recovering complacent person. The thing I am most grateful for is knowing the Lord will carry me through anything. Including exercise.

Is the habit formed?

Twenty-one days is a long time. When I started this I thought, "I can do anything for twenty-one days." How little did I know how long that was. In fact today is only day eighteen but it feels like I've been doing this for several months. While I was thinking about this today I started pondering whether a new habit can really be started or a bad habit stopped in twenty-one days like I've always heard.

Well, I think the answer to that is yes. I realized as I was walking today that I exercise now without really thinking about it or planning for it. The first two weeks I dreaded it but I've noticed the past few days that it's become something I do every day as if it's a known fact that it will get done. Like eating or showering or any other thing I might do every day. Now, I may not get up early to do it but I make sure that I exercise at some point every day. Don't get me wrong, it's not strenuous exercise. It's enjoyable stuff like walking at the mall or the park or around the neighborhood. If I get up early I still use the elliptical but I enjoy myself now.

That's not all. I also noticed today that when I'm reading the Bible I'm able to concentrate and enjoy what I'm reading. I had gotten to the place that reading was dull and I could read the same verse over and over and still not know what I just read. It seems the twenty-one day challenge I set for myself has kicked in. I'm doing what I set out to do. It's a miracle. Maybe not fire coming from heaven to burn up an alter but for me it's the exact same. A miracle I really needed.

Everything is a choice.

In the end it boils down to choices. Overcoming how I feel, to do what I know I should do. This morning my list of chores was long and I wanted to get started on the list. Instead, I forced myself to exercise for 30 minutes. I actually feel better after exercising and of course I already know all of the health benefits of doing it. For some reason that doesn't help me want to spend the time exercising. However, making the decision that you will exercise and that it will be a priority AND making the decision you will spend time in the Bible then you will do it. It's about choices. I always have time for what's important to me.

Open my eyes so I may see.

If I were to pray and ask the Lord to rain down fire on an alter, would He? He did for Elija. (I Kings 18) It seems I have been drawn to Elija and Elisha and I've been thinking about them all day. God had the ravens feed Elija and both men prayed and asked the Lord to bring people back from the dead and He did it. God used them to do a lot of miracles. Does He still work like that today?

This made me look back over the last 35 years of my life and see the miracles God has done in my life. Believe it or not I was able to find a lot. Not only was I able to see where God's hand has been at work in my life, but I am aware that there are many things He has done and I don't even know about it. My eyes were not open to what was going on around me. That's why I've been reading 2Kings 6. Elisha and his servant were surrounded by the enemy's army and Elisha said, "Don't be afraid, those who are with us are more than those who are with them." And Elisha prayed, "O Lord, open his eyes so he may see." Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha." (vs. 16-17)

I want my eyes open to see the Lord surrounding me with His mighty army, ready to do battle on my behalf. "Ask and it will be given to you..." (Matthew 7:7)

I am a Conqueror!

What is the "truth" Philippians 4:8 is talking about? One of the many truths of the Bible is Romans 8:37, "we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." Conquerors is in the present tense. Not the future and not the past. That means today as I have temptations thrown at me I will conqueror them all through Jesus Christ. As I go about my day this verse will be constantly on my mind. When I look in the mirror I will say, "I am a conqueror." I might even try to look mean as I say it. Granted that will probably only make me laugh. As I run up and down the stairs doing laundry I will be saying, "I am a conqueror." And as I walk by the candy bowl I will say, "I am a conqueror." When a critical thought enters my head I will do a karate chop and say, "I am a conqueror." When negativity comes or thought of money wander through my head I will stomp and yell, "I am a conqueror!" If you happen to pass by my house today and see me doing karate chops or yelling or stomping you will know why.

Reaping a harvest.

"Let us not grow weary in doing what is good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Gal 6:9 It amazes me that this verse exists in the Bible. For some reason it doesn't sound like a Bible verse to me. It sounds more like something you would hear from a motivational speaker instead of God. But God knows I get discouraged and start to think I won't succeed. He knows my weak little mind needs a reminder that the reward is out there. Don't quit.

This morning I spent my exercise time doing crunches. Again, I'm trying to do something different plus I need to strengthen my back muscles to reduce the risk of back pain or injury. Getting up was difficult but I want to reap the harvest of a healthy body and mind. The number one most motivating factor that has kept me going each day is the accountability to my friends. If I didn't have them encouraging me and praying for me and letting me know they are checking my blog then I think I would have quit. So thank you for the encouragement!

Change is good.

The thought of getting on the elliptical this morning just sounded terrible to me. So I decided to take my son with me to the mall and do several laps. Doing the same routine every morning is not a lot of fun for me but I found that being at the mall gave me a lot of "things" to look at and wish that I had. It was still a good change. Plus I got to put my new strategy of "changing my thinking" to work. I probably used every verse I've meditated on the past twelve days to have self-control. John 14:21, "Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me.....and I too will love him and show myself to him." I want to love the Lord and be found faithful and I desire the Lord to show Himself to me.

Getting back up.

My one year old son is learning to walk and yesterday I noticed that he must fall 40% of the time. Sometimes he cries for a little bit because he bumped his head on the wall when he fell or his hands hit the concrete and that didn't feel too good. He may crawl for a few minutes after the fall but he ALWAYS gets back up. Why? What is it in a one year old that makes them want to get back up and try again?

Every morning I get up early and spend time on the elliptical singing praises to the Lord and meditating on His word. Then I spend time in prayer asking for the Lords direction and grace. Somehow by 1PM I've lost my focus. It's like I never even spent time with the Lord. I forget I'm fighting a fight against my old habits. The activities of the day seem to take my mind and I just forget the promises that I focused on just a few hours ago. I get discouraged and think, "Well, I've blown it again. Why should I even try? If I'm just going to keep failing I might as well quit." I need a little bit of my son's ability to keep getting up and trying again no matter how many times I fall. I need to run like a man with a purpose and beat my body and make it my slave. (1Corinthians 9: 26-27) You rarely seen an adult falling when they walk. So eventually my son will also stop falling when he stands up, but he doesn't know that now. My hope is that if I don't give up and I keep getting up even after falling for the millionth time then there will be a day that I don't fall. Or the days that I fall will be so rare that I'm shocked that it happened.

Perseverance

Why doesn't God just wave His hand over me and make me perfect? Why must I struggle with these habits and temptations? Life would just be so much easier if I got up every day singing and praising the Lord without a single other thought.

Then I read, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." (James 1:2-4) Good grief. Joy! Joy when I face the temptations and struggles! This is going to be very difficult but I know that the Lord will do this through me. He does not tell me to do something He doesn't make me capable of doing.

So while temptations come I will sing praises to the Lord and consider it joy!

2 days in 1

I did not quit! My computer did! The past two days I have gotten up and spent time on the elliptical meditating on God's word and exercising. However, my computer is broken and I am only able to post right now because I'm borrowing my sisters computer.

It makes a huge difference for me when I know others are praying for me and holding me accountable to this 21 day commitment. The past two days I've continued going because I want to fight the good fight. I want to finish the race and keep the faith. (2Tim. 4:7) I want to be consistent every day that I live on this earth so that when I stand before the Lord I will be found faithful.

To do this I have to change my thinking and the patterns that I have established over the past 35 years (in 2 days). The past two days I have really been working on not being conformed to this world, but being transformed by the renewing of my mind. (Rom. 12:2) I realize that I eat when I'm tired or bored. I become negative in my thinking when I'm tired or stressed. Today I did some fatigue eating. So this evening as I meditated on scripture and spent time talking to the Lord about this area of my life I realized I need to spend that time "eating" God's word instead of food. Or I need to change my negative thought pattern and turn to the Bible immediately when I feel tired. Then I can stop it before it even begins. So this starts tomorrow. The first feelings of fatigue or stress will be my signal to sit down for 5 minutes and focus on Jesus to fill me up again.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Feelings of failure.

I did not exercise. When my alarm went off I just shut it off and tried to go back to sleep but I felt so guilty I just laid there with my eyes open thinking about how I should be exercising. After 30 minutes I got up and opened up God's word but my mind was so fatigued that I couldn't meditate or even concentrate on the words. I realize that exercise is what helps me get my mind energized for Bible study. Why then do I still prefer to stay in bed? I actually began to dread today as I thought about how defeated I was going to be in all the areas of my life that I'm working on. Especially my negative feelings and thought life.

That's when the Lord showed me that He will bring the victory for me today. I Corinthians 15:57, "Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." Today this verse will be my lifeline because the victory has already been won.

Is meditating the secret?

Most of my life I have wondered why David was the apple of God's heart. With as much bad stuff as he did it seems he should have been marked "black sheep." I've even prayed that I would be like David but I didn't know what his secret was. I think I've figured it out. In fact David told me in Psalms 1: 2-3, " But his delight is in the law of the Lord and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields it's fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers."

Whatever he does! That's what I want. I want that kind of success. This morning as I got up to exercise and meditate on God's word I decided I would also spend time worshipping the Lord. If my heart is turned to Christ and Him alone then He is leading me and when He is in control I CAN NOT FAIL! Now that is power.

Oh how I wish I had Oprah's money!

If I had Oprah's money I could hire someone to get me out of bed and exercise with me and cook all my meals so that they taste wonderful without any bad stuff in them. This takes me back to an area of my life I'm working on - discontentment! I have been blessed with so much and yet I want more. More money, more stuff, more house, more, more, more. What is wrong with me?

This morning I chose Phil 4:8 to meditate on. It talks about thinking about what is true. Instead of dreaming about what I wish I had I will think about how much I have. I live in a free country, I have a good job (that I love), I am able to worship the Lord freely, I have a nice home, I have a good husband, I have a healthy son, I am healthy, I am able to exercise, I am able to buy food, when I die I know I will see Jesus face to face and because of this I can lead a life of joy and peace. What more could a girl ask for?

Today discouragement and lies get kicked to the door. Today I will focus on my blessings!

Can it be?

This morning my husband told me he would get up with my son and I could sleep in an extra hour. However, at 6:30am I found myself wanting to get up and get on the elliptical and begin my time with the Lord. It's day four and I'm already looking forward to my time with Jesus. Can it be? Then the Lord reminded me "But they that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles...." That is me. My strength and joy are renewed. My time with Jesus is sweet again and not a chore. I know this is from all of my friends praying for me and encouraging me onward. Thank you. God is faithful.

Regret

This is only the third day and I regret telling everyone I was going to do this. I want to sleep and return to my life of complacency. However, by God's power and strength I did get up and I began meditating on Hebrews 11. The Hall of Faith. These people lived by faith and never got to see the promise. I get to see results daily. As I spend time in God's word I get filled with the Holy Spirit and receive all the blessings that go with Him. A life of joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control. Yet I still struggle. The crazy thing is, I feel so good after getting off the elliptical and I find my day is so much better after spending dedicated time in God's Word. So I guess I really have no regrets.

There's always something!

When I started this blog - two whole days ago, I knew I was scheduled to have an outpatient procedure done today (it's just an injection into my hip and tailbone). I also knew that I wouldn't be allowed to have any food prior to the procedure because they will be putting me to sleep. However, I thought I would be able to drink some water until maybe 8am therefore making it possible for me to do my 20 minutes. However, the nurse called me yesterday and told me I couldn't drink ANYTHING. So I began contimplating how painful it would be to exercise without drinking anything just so I could make sure I did it. My husband quickly discouraged me from doing it.

This is the very reason it is so difficult for me to get started doing anything. I constantly have something just around the corner. For example, my birthday, a vacation, a procedure, a dinner party, guests coming, and the list goes on. This time I decided to take the plunge and just figure it out as I go. So maybe this afternoon after the injection when I'm able to drink something I will do my 20 minutes. However, the past two times I've had this done I slept the rest of the day. We'll have to see.

On a brighter note I want you to know the Lord was faithful yesterday and I want to thank you guys that prayed for me because during my 2-4pm eating frenzy time I "called out to the Lord and He heard me."(Psalm 34:17) Just as He promised. I didn't even eat one bite. I was shocked! I shouldn't have been though because God has always been faithful. I've just chosen not to call out to Him.

This morning I had decided to still get out of bed early to spend time with the Lord and spend 20 minutes on my knees in prayer (this is something I never do and I will tell you it's great exercise). When my alarm went off the same thoughts went through my head, "I don't want to get up." But immediately the Lord reminded me "that the same Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in me." (Romans 8:11) It took that same Spirit to get me out of bed this morning. I'm pathetic I tell you. However, my time with Jesus was sweet and I will be meditating on this passage all day today as I face negative thoughts, discontentment, sloth, and gluttony.

The first day.

Do you know how long 20 minutes is? It's a very long time. However, I am proud to report that at 6am this morning I got up and exercised. When the alarm went off my first thought was, "I hate to exercise. I don't want to do this." But I knew I had sent out this blog telling people to hold me accountable. So I got up.

The verse I meditated on was Psalm 34:17 "The righteous cry, and the Lord heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles." The problem I have with living a self controlled life has a lot to do with my negative thinking. I was once asked, "What is one thing you could do today that would change your life." The answer is easy....Change my thinking. So this morning when I didn't want to get up and exercise it was because I was thinking about how much I hate to do it. If I think about how good it makes me feel then hopefully my attitude towards it will improve.

Now for the big test. From 2-4pm is my happy hour or gluttony hour whichever you want to use. For some reason I want to eat everything during that time. That is when I will have to cry out to the Lord for deliverance! Please pray for me. I'm going to live by faith that I am free from the magnetic pull to the fridge.

Here goes....

This is something I've thought about for a long time. It's easy thinking about something because at least you are doing something. Right? Well, the past week I read the book Crazy Love written by Francis Chan and I can no longer just THINK. I must act.

Over the past 34 years I have allowed myself to overeat, not exercise, daydream about winning the lottery, grumble, and complain all the while THINKING about the day that I get myself under control with the self-control the Holy Spirit offers. In the Bible it says "faith without works is dead." Francis Chan reminded me in his book that I can't just sit back and ask God to make me free from my gluttony or sloth or negativity or whatever it is that is bothering me. I need to live my life in the truth that I am already free from all of this and start living it. That's where faith comes in.

Tomorrow morning, with the Lords help, I will remove my body from the comfortable bed and start my exercise plan. This includes meditating on God's word while I work out on the elliptical then immediately spend some time in His word. Now I'm not going to go crazy and think I'm working out for a long period of time at the beginning (or maybe ever). I've always read that you need 30 minutes of cardio work to really do any good for you heart. However, once upon a time, I read that you could just do 20 minutes and get the same benefit. I choose to do just that. I think I can manage 20 minutes.

Now you wonder why in the world I'm blogging about this. Who in the world cares what I'm doing. People (most of my friends) love to exercise and they talk about how wonderful it is. Well, I hate it so I need people praying for me, encouraging me, and most of all by posting this I know I've got to be accountable. The next 21 days I will change my thinking, eating, exercise habits and when it's over I will be 35 years old. So, I'm thinking of this like a birthday gift to myself. I'm dreading pushing the "publish post" button. So, here goes.....